If letting go is so powerful, why is it so hard? Because it feels like loss. We stay in draining jobs, relationships, or roles because we’ve invested time, energy, or pride. We fear walking away means admitting we failed. I get it—I stayed in an abusive relationship partly because I couldn’t face proving my family right after they’d warned me. If I left, what would all those years have been for?
Some of you might hesitate at the idea of “giving up.” Maybe you’ve been taught that quitting is weak, or that perseverance is always noble. It’s okay to wrestle with that. Letting go doesn’t mean abandoning your values—it means choosing what aligns with your truth. Holding on can be strength, but so can walking away. The difference lies in why you’re staying. Is it love, purpose, or growth? Or is it fear, guilt, or shame?
For me, letting go meant leaving a relationship that endangered my son and me. It meant releasing the belief that my past defined my worth. Each time I let go, I gained clarity, freedom, and power. You can too—whether it’s a toxic friendship, a dead-end career, or the voice in your head saying you’re not enough.
How to Let Go: A Practical Path to Freedom
Identifying a limiting belief is the first step. The second is rewriting it. This isn’t a one-time fix—it’s a practice. Old beliefs resurface, especially when you stretch toward something new. But you can meet them with curiosity, not fear. Here’s how I did it, and how you can too.
Step 1: Uncover Your Beliefs
Limiting beliefs hide in the stories we tell ourselves. Listen to your language—it’s a window into your mind. Do you say, “I’m not good enough,” “I have to please everyone,” or “I’ll never get ahead”? Those are clues. For me, the belief “my past disqualifies me” showed up whenever I hesitated to pursue coaching.
Try this exercise:
Take 5 minutes to journal. Write down a goal you want but haven’t chased (e.g., a new job, a healthier relationship). Then write what stops you. Be honest—what’s the voice in your head saying? That’s your limiting belief.
Step 2: Question the Story
Once you spot a belief, ask:
- Is this objectively true?
- Where did it come from?
- What’s it protecting me from?
- Who would I be without it?
When I questioned “my past disqualifies me,” I realized it came from fear of judgment, not fact. I’d helped others transform—why couldn’t I claim that role? Without that belief, I felt free to step into my purpose.
Step 3: Rewrite the Narrative
Replace the old belief with one that serves you. Instead of “my past disqualifies me,” I chose, “My past is my strength—it’s why I connect so deeply with others.” Write your new belief down. Say it out loud. Act as if it’s true—because it can be.
Here’s a real example: A client of mine believed, “I’m too old to start over.” Through questioning, she saw it stemmed from comparing herself to others. She rewrote it: “My experience gives me wisdom to succeed in new ways.” That shift led her to launch a business at 55.
Step 4: Act and Reflect
Beliefs change through action. Take one small step toward your goal, even if it’s scary. Then reflect: What felt different? Did the old belief creep in? Keep questioning and acting—it’s a cycle of growth.
Your Turn: What Will You Let Go?
Letting go isn’t about erasing your past—it’s about evolving beyond it. For me, it meant leaving abuse, releasing shame about my career, and rewriting beliefs that kept me small. Each choice brought me closer to a life I love—one where I coach others to break free, using tools like NLP and hypnosis I invested in along the way.
So I ask you:
- What are you holding onto that no longer serves you?
- What would change if you let it go—without guilt or shame?
- Who could you become if you chose yourself?
You don’t owe anyone your suffering. You don’t owe anyone an explanation. As Maya Angelou said, “Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better.” Your past is not your limit—it’s your foundation. Let go of what weighs you down. Walk away—not to give up, but to rise up. Your power is waiting.